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Just whatever…

So, now that I have you hooked with that thoroughly captivating title, let’s have a talk. Just me and the bountiful audience of three. Recently I’ve been going through a renaissance of sorts. And by that I mean I’m not the wee child I was…let’s see…half a year ago. Has it really been that long since I last posted on here? Holy fucking almighty. That’s enough time for whole ass fetus to start growing limbs and shit. Anywhoos. So the last year for me was, how do I put this delicately, a shitsandwhich of infinite proportions. And the best part is, I actually accomplished a lot the past year. Definitely the most I’ve accomplished in the past few years preceding 2022.

So why do I feel worse than I did when I was doing literal fuckall? Don’t flatter yourselves, it’s not because of the crushing guilt I feel for not being more regular on here. Aaaaand there goes the rest of my followers. But for realsies though, I can’t actually put a finger on what’s leaving me feeling so empty and unaccomplished. No, I can actually put all of my fingers, plus two of my gorgeous toes on the multiple reasons why I’m feeling…just whatever. So sit back, relax, and provide my misery some much needed company!

  1. My need for external validation has ruined most of my life. It’s so comforting to know it’s not going anywhere anytime soon
  2. My dreams are big. Huge. Enormous fucking monsters that are starting to feel more and more like the hot greek daddy Sissyphus finally found a safe place -on my shoulders-to rest his might rock ball
  3. I’m a perfectionist. There. Now I get to kill you…
  4. My job is a soul sucking succubus
  5. My self esteem, try as I might to increase it in more direct ways, keeps circling closer and closer to the lowest bowels of hell
  6. I love to hate people, until they start hating me, and then I sing a soulful ballad in my shower about how people keep leaving me unprompted. I’M THE VICTIM GODDAMNIT!

Let me know if ya’ll need a part two. Cause oh boy, there’s plenty where that came from. Which problematic traits do you have that you don’t mind sharing with the entire world? I’m all ears…

Published by Pradipta Surya Chakraborty

Here is where I document my life. Every moment, every thought, every emotion. I hope you stay, dear reader, but if you leave... There are no hard feelings.

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